Reading Bernhard Schlink, guilt ridden tormented stories, clearly written. I think Jeremy Clarke gave me the book last summer, I just started reading it, randomly selected a story about a man who discovered his wife had an affair. Now she's dead.. There's a beautiful line about the heart only being able to hold the love it can manage to contain.
"He no longer believed in falling and hitting bottom, so that he could start all over again. He had loved that image, had imagined the fall and the impact as painless, weightless. But falling could be something quite different. If he fell, then maybe it would be a crash landing, leaving him lying there with broken limbs and a shattered skull."
Maybe we shouldn't let the people we love fall, perhaps we cannot prevent the pain and break the fall. Perhaps we should just let them get on with shattered skulls and lives of compromise that fit like cheap suits.
The light here is clear.
I meet thousands of people. Maybe they're not what I want them to be and their hearts can't hold nobility or trust. Maybe the clear light is illuminating darkened corners and truth leaks out.
Can you keep a secret? He always asks me. But secrets cover up lies.